The Way it Was
by Rantzilla
Summary: Sasuke and Naruto document their entire relationship on a cassette tape. Or many, many cassette tapes. What happens when Naruto and Sasuke come together to contemplate and discuss their complex and blooming friendship over the years? Terrible things.
1. The Kiss

Oh well, this idea sort of just popped into my head. I'm watching the entire series again, from beginning to end. Idunno. I probably won't finish but hey, this is the most canon shit I've ever written. c:

I'll update every Friday since I have the first three chapters already written.

New title? Please? This one fails so hard.

K. Since this is the first chapter I guess I should explain why I wrote this. Well, as most of you know, I love SasuNaru with a burning passion- and that mixed with watching all of the Naruto episodes again equals this fic! It's because this is my first time watching all of it as a yaoi fangirl, and I keep finding subtle hints of SasuNaru (that I probably imagine) and here and there I just throw in some of my own stuff.

Enjoy, I guess.

* * *

**The Way it Was**

_Chapter 1: The Kiss

* * *

_

It started after we formed our teams, essentially. Hm, no… maybe a little before. Ok, maybe a lot before. But that's unnecessary information! The point is, something had begun to… happen- between Sasuke and I, when we kissed, of course.

No matter what he says- it STARTED with that kiss! And I was so not the one to initiate it! Well, yeah, it was kind of my fault but he enjoyed it!

"I did not! I specifically told you that I'd kill you when it happened."

"Denial, Sasuke-teme. Denial."

"Whatever. Just shut up and continue."

After the kiss, well, I started to realize the feelings of hate that bubbled up inside me every time I so much as _saw _the prick weren't really… hatred. But I had been young and stupid back then-

"You're still stupid."

-and didn't know the difference! So, I kept to my crush on Sakura. Which resulted in me attacking the totally unprepared Sasuke- who got his butt handed to him, may I add-

"You were an absolute imbecile! I was just surprised! Jesus, how many times do I have to-?!"

-and thus the first time I ever saw little teme in bondage.

"…keep those things to yourself."

Anyway, later, after following through with my ever-so-clever and perfectly-executed plan, I was with Sakura, wooing her to my heart's content. This is when Sakura leaned in to kiss me, it felt… wrong, I guess. Sure, the stomach pains were from that rotten milk I had drank that morning, but I was also nervous and well… from today's point of view I guess… I kinda sorta didn't want her lips to touch mine after Sasuke's. I don't know… I could still taste him, and I wanted it to linger- it was all so confusing at the time, so I decided to blame the rancid milk. Of course, it was still the milk's fault anyway but that's not the point I'm trying to make! The point is, it started from the kiss, and continued with another- almost- kiss.

"In your opinion."

"You choose to comment on that and not on any of the sappy stuff I just said? I'm shocked."

"You are the biggest dweeb ever. My _taste_? I know I taste good, but you sound like a fangirl."

"There it is!"

"Right, let me tell _my _side of this."

"If it gets you to stop making fun of me…"

"Hn. Fat chance."

I hated Naruto.

"Teme!"

"I said _hated,_ you ignorant dolt. Past tense, dobe."

But I had realized long before he had that there was something brewing between us- even before that kiss. I, being the young and imperfect genius that I was-

"Meaning you didn't know either."

-couldn't differentiate between my feelings for Naruto. It was a mix of intense… like, and boiling hatred. Then, the kiss. Which didn't change anything whatsoever for me, by the way.

"Liar."

"Shut up."

"Hmph!"

Then when Naruto unfairly jumped me while I was _eating _no less, I didn't feel anything. Especially when he tied me up. Well, I felt something- but it was mostly, 'if I see him I'll kill him.'

"He was aroused."

"I was _not _aroused! I don't have weird kinks like _someone _I know. Not that I'm complaining, really. But wasn't the whip last night a bit too-"

"CONTINUE WITH THE STORY, SASUKE."

"Hn."

After escaping the ropes easily, I pursued Naruto, in hopes of kicking the ever-loving crap out of him. Hey, never said I wasn't abusive.

"He is."

Unbeknown to him, I had seen the whole nearly-kissing-Sakura sequence, and_ that's _when it started for me. For some unexplained reason, this insane homicidal feeling coursed through me, because I did _not_ want that woman kissing what was mine- what I had kissed only what, an hour or two ago? To say the least, I am an insanely jealous person- but I thought that I now liked Sakura, go figure.

"Seriously!? You never told me any of this!"

But when she started bashing Naruto's way of life or whatever the hell she was doing, I wanted nothing more than to curl my fingers around her neck and-

"Teme…"

I mean, take a kunai and shove it down her-

"Teme!"

What I meant was, burn her completely and-

"TEME!"

"Interrupt me one more time, usuratonkachi. You'll regret it."

"…HMPH!"

Needless to say, I wanted to kill someone. Still, I was unable to grasp the fact that I might possibly feel something more than friendly for dead-last here.

"…."

I'd also like to add that Naruto pouncing at me every chance he got (aka, right out of the bathroom) reminded me of a fangirl.

"…….."

And the way he didn't just disperse all of his clones when he needed to use the bathroom was far beyond any acts of stupidity that I had witnessed before that.

"THAT'S IT TEM—Wait, what are you doing, Sasuke?! SASUKE UWAAH!"

"You asked for it!"

"SASUK- AHAHAHA, SASU- AHAHAA- KE! P-PLE- EHEHE- ASEE! ST-STO- AHAHA- P-P."

"I told you not to interrupt!"

"B-BU- AHAHAHA! Mmph!"

-SCUFFLING NOISES-

"Mmmm… Sasuke…"

"Wait one second, Naruto."

"…Mmmmhm…"

"Sorry, we'll have to continue this tomorrow, Naruto and I have business to attend to, so, Naruto, bed or cou-?"

-END OF TAPE-

-END OF TAPE-

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Yeah, the whole thing is that they're making a documentary of their long-lived and complex relationship. I'll try not to rush it but I'm horrible with that. Thanks for reading. c:


	2. Sasukesexual

I was going to delay this one on account of I was talking to my friend on the phone whilst typing some of it and editing. I'm not completely satisfied with this chapter BUT hey I did it! There may be a little fluffy concerned OOCness. I didn't know if that is something Sasuke would do.... But I did my best.

TOO BAD MY BEST SUCKS. FFF.

Alright, well I had this one typed already, but the next one will be delayed. For some reason the third document got deleted from my computer so I have to re-type it. HOORAY. /wrists

See you in a week!

* * *

**The Way it Was**

_Chapter 2: Sasukesexual

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_

Naruto again!

I woke up before Sasuke for once, he's a little tired after- …uh, we played Twister. Lots and lots of Twister. Mmmm… Twister…. OH DEAR GOD- IGNORE THAT. ANYWAY. Uh… Teme is horrible at that game so uh he got tired and uh… um….

Moving on!

I kind of feel like we only skimmed the kiss yesterday, so I'll review! Sasuke and I kissed for the first time, and it wasn't like those stupid corny love novels you find nowadays where it's bang schwoop instant love. No, it was actually kind of…. Well… very unexpected. I was too shocked to really register it at first, and when I did, he had already pulled away. My natural reaction was to spit and gag once I _had _figured it out, and then when I got to contemplating it later… Yeah, his taste lingered. His lips were soft and perfect and delicious…. I'm not gay! I'm… Sasukesexual? I mean look at him! He is sex on legs! I would never tell him this if he was up, but I really, really lo-

"N-Naruto…?"

"SHIT."

-MISSING INFORMATION-

-MISSING INFORMATION-

-UPLOADING FILE-

-FILE UPLOAD COMPLETE-

Yo…

"Naruto! Just tell me what you were going to say!"

"…Sasuke, can we please just do this documentary thing? Please?"

"…Naruto…"

Where did we leave off yesterday? The kissing… Sakura nearly kissing me… Right, let's move on to Kakashi's training…

"Naruto, just let me do it for now, alright? Go get something to eat, it looks like you haven't eaten yet."

"…Thanks…. Teme."

"…Hn. Just go, usuratonkachi."

Something is seriously wrong with that usuratonkachi. I'll figure it out, too. Later, though. First- the training.

Oh the joy.

He had told us not to eat. So I didn't. Simple as that, right? First day of training as a real ninja, you just have to listen to your sensei, right?

Yeah, at the time, I didn't know how much of an asshole Kakashi was.

Ah, yes… the romance bit of this. Well, before that- the butt technique Kakashi used on Naruto!

I swear on my parents' grave that I will one day tear up that mask, take a picture, and send it to everyone in the village- and then castrate him for deflowering my dobe.

Jesus that looked like it hurt, though. I'm gentle with Naruto because of that.

….

…Moving on.

I really would have helped Naruto down from that tree had I not been so consumed with becoming a real ninja. There are just some things money can't buy- and being dubbed a ninja is one of them. Therefore, bells first, saving damsel in distress later. Besides, he could save himself, right? And I was perfectly fine with fighting Kakashi on my own, wasn't I?

We proceeded to fail miserably- and Naruto got himself tied to a log. (BONDAGE: Naruto: 2 Sasuke: 1.)

Wonderful team, aren't we?

By that time I had realized my mistake- and on some sheer ungodly whim I decided to offer my lunch to Naruto- but got thwarted and outshined by that slut Sakura, go figure.

This was yet another step in our relationship, a part you wouldn't know about. After we had all left him tied to the log, eventually Kakashi sent me back to untie the loud-mouthed idiot. I happily obliged, just another chance to tease him. When I got there, he was staring at his stomach with such concentration that I thought he was going to have an aneurysm of some sort. It turns out he was trying to 'focus on his hunger so that he would forget about it.'

That was his exact logic, word for word.

Don't even say it, I already know.

Anyway- I went to hack off the ropes with a kunai when all of a sudden he just… flopped over, all limp and such. It was funny to watch, really- I'm sadistic, sue me. I forced a few rice balls down his throat after that, but he wouldn't wake up.

So I had to carry him home.

How, you may ask?

Bridal style, of course!

There's no better way to feminize a boy than to cart him around in your arms like a newlywed!

Here comes the fun part though, I didn't take him to his house straightaway. There just wasn't going to be another opportunity like this- not in a lifetime. I had been curious lately. From that kiss, to the seething jealousy, to the wanting to feed him despite the chance of getting failed by Kakashi- Naruto perplexed me, in more ways than one.

So I laid the dobe on my bed, watched him for a few moments- he's adorable when he sleeps, you know?- and then I opened his jumpsuit and-

"Teme, what are you talking about?"

"Ah! Nothing, Naruto. Just about to get to our first real mission."

"Oh! Oh! Let me tell that one!"

"Fine, but only if you enlighten me on what was wrong earlier."

"...We're out of ramen."

"Liar. What was wrong?"

"I'm not telling and you can't make me!"

"Alright folks, tune in next time when I, Uchiha Sasuke, master of all arts and of Naruto's anatomy, inform you of the happenings in Team 7 when we embarked on our very first intense mission- the escort to the Mist! See you then!"

"…Who are you talking to? And WHERE ARE YOU PUTTING YOUR HANDS-?!"

-END OF TAPE-

-END OF TAPE-

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Short chapter is short. I'd say the next one will be long to compensate, but I don't lie.

HOWEVER. Two chapters from now, it will probably be SUPER SPECIAL AWESOME long. So two weeks! Ur hurrr.

I'll keep to my posting schedule as much as possible, but sometimes it will come out on Saturday if I forget or if I'm not satisfied with what I've written after the million times that I've edited.

Thanks for all the positive reviews! I ENJOY THEM.

(Aren't you surprised at my normalcy in the Author's Comments? My God.)

Don't worry. I'll be crazy soon. MY EMOTIONS VARY FROM DAY TO DAY. AND RIGHT NOW I'M TIRED.

AGAIN. See you next Friday!


End file.
